B47) Birthday beatings

God forbid someone on the cellblock or dorm find out about your birthday on your birthday. It's a call to arms. The first time I got to see a demonstration of a birthday beating in action I found it unsettling. Irish got it. Bad. We called him “Irish” because he was from Ireland.

Irish was small in stature and in character. He was sort of an asshole. Acted like his shit didn’t stink. Not a good posture to have in this place. That’s all the incentive these motherfuckers need to beat him down severely on his birthday. And they did.

None of the blows were on visible. That’s the way they roll. Absolutely no face shots. Nothing to the head. Those types of wounds got noticed in the worst way.

They took him down right in his cell. The assholes have done it so many times they make it look routine. Like Navy Seals or the swat team moving in on a bad guy. Into the cell they go. Quickly and quietly. They attack and subdue their victim. Once immobilized they begin beating and pounding on the big muscles, the quads, as well as the shoulder.

They pound and pound. They held him down and delivered what must of seemed like a never ending stream of pain filled punches.

They beat those quads until exhausted. When someone stopped from exhaustion, someone else stepped in and continued on with more of the same.

They left irish in a puddle of pain on the floor of his cell. He lay there crying. That was disturbing. Hearing a grown man crying like that. He was unable to get up. He laid there until one of the guards walked through. his celly helped get him to his bunk.

In prison this is considered good clean fun.

They got me at North Unit. A group of “friends” headed by Big Joe.

Joe stood six foot four. He was a towering character and could always be found with a smile on his face. Joe did not look like a convict. Part of him was at peace with the world. Another part of him was tormented.

When I arrived to North Unit I found two of my former suppliers on the yard (Brothers) . What a gift. Both were friends with Big Joe.

Joe Collins lead the attack. I can’t recall who else was there? Right in the middle of their attack, me subdued on the floor in the dorm,  a guard walked in. The pounding stopped. Everyone froze while looking at the guard. 

It was funny that no one got up. They maintained their positions and posture. It wasn’t like with Irish. This hurt but not that bad. It actually was good clean fun.

With everyone frozen like statues one of the guys was quick to yell:

“It’s his birthday CO” (we called them CO’s for Correctional Officer)

The guard looked astonished.

Still no one moved.

The guard did not speak. He walked over. Bend down. Pulled my prison ID from my shirt pocket. He looked at the birth date. It was my birthday. The guard tossed my ID down. Smartly did an about face and said;

“Carry on” with his back to us and he left the building.

The birthday beating ended right there. That was just too funny.

We all got a good laugh out of it.